I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
