Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
