Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Randomize
