shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
