please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
That's when you crack a 10am beer
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
