you guys were way drunker than both of me
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
