my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I wish you could order shots online.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I'm sobbing to NWA
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize