we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
