So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
grandma shit on top of the toilet
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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