Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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