I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
