Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Every concussion has its silver lining
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
