just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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