Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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