Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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