they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
You're earring is so big in my mouth
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
