On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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