I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
