We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Randomize
