Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
