i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
We named our party play list daddy issues
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
