I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Randomize
