I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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