I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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