i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Randomize
