Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I pour the whiskey from now on
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
