The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
