The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I've blown a few things in my day
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize
