this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Your cock deserves a montage
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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