Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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