would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
