Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
