Where are you?
In a non slutty way
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Randomize
