Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
