and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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