Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
my poor anus
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize
