i would punch a child for taco bell
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
