absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
We have started to decorate penises.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
