U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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