Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
