she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
