Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize
