on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
