i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
