Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Randomize
