I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
