1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
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