i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
i need an iv and a liver transplant
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
