Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
