I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
